Uni

So i finally made it here! I'm a couple of days in and completely loving it! At the moment i'm really sick though, but i can deal with that because all the people i live with are really looking out for me, One of the guys has been force feeding me cough medicine, panadol and cold and flu tablets, but i have a feeling what i have is worse then a cold or flu. The first night here was really good, i felt like part of the group straight away! The guy living in the room next to me is the cutest, we stayed up all night building a cubby house and talking about everything! Last night we stayed up all night again but for a different reason :) In hindsight it might not have been the best idea, since i really can't talk today, but wow I love uni life!

I don't really miss home much unless i'm on my own, its hard then, but i've been spending alot of time with everyone i live with. I love how relaxed it is here! like the other day we all just randomly decided to drive up to a look out point and relax, listen to music and chat. But at the same time this place is so much fun! 2 nights ago we went on a massive scavenger hunt around the campus! I've never taken my shirt off in public so much! I really think i'm going to love it here! I just kinda can't wait for classes to start!

I best go and crawl back under the covers, I really want to get better soon!

Love me xx

Lucky people

I wish i was one of them lucky people who never have to work at anything, yet everything falls into place for them. I managed to coast my way through high school, topping the year in subjects, high distinctions, awards from the principal and i did minimum homework and drank to excess. I think this is starting to catch up with me now, my good luck has turned into bad karma, or perhaps my bad karma is coming from another source but it seems nothing this year is easy. I managed to get into uni, into my dream course no less but apparently now i have no-where to live. Fabulous.

Since i last updated this i got drunk had sex with my ex in his car, then again sober at my house a day or two later, when we had this deep conversation about how he would be so shattered if i slept with anyone else... Guilt is a bitch and i never used to feel it. The most bizarre thing is that when i cheated on a guy (not proud of it) i never felt bad but now i'm not with him i feel like shit about it. I wish my life would just be easy again, when i didnt have to worry about money, or having somewhere to live, or stress about still being in love with my ex.

It's getting so close now and i dont feel organised at all! I don't think i've ever been this unprepared in my life. I'm so scared and i feel so lonely at the moment, the one person i want to talk to is the one person who i shouldn't talk to. This wonderful guy who put up with my shit, with a smile on his face for close to 2 years.

Oh my god i'm even boring myself with this! I want to go back in time to when i felt lucky and didn't feel pressure. To when i was still innocent and could honestly say not guilty.

I have a friend who's parents are worth a million or more, he got accomadation on campus early, his first preference even. Perhaps his bad Karma hasn't caught up to him yet, or perhaps he hasn't earnt bad karma. Or maybe he's just one of them f**king lucky people!

Love me xx